Lord, in the midst of all my sadness I still feel you.
In the midst of bewilderment- I know you hold me.
I know because I could not stand, were it for you Lord.
I cannot stop the tears, I cannot sing without weeping.
My tears are overflowing.
My heart runs over.
And you keep me full.
The pain of losing those I love is strangely buoyed by the presence of Christ abiding in me.
I feel wrapped in comfort by the power of the Holy Spirit.
I feel guided by you.
While I know I have faith, while I am thankful for my faith—I feel surprised by its power…
I feel surprised- in awe, of your power still.
How do I not know? How do I not remember?
You saved me from the pit.
You brought me up out of the depths of darkness and poured your light and safety, comfort, and grace over me.
When all others abandoned, you Lord did not.
You always keep your promises. You are constant and steadfast.
And so again, I do not fear.
Once I again, I know how this story ends.
Once again, I remember—that this is indeed not the end.
I feel held in a powerful tension of the kingdom.
I feel like my faith is anchored with you in your Kingdom.
I live in the now and the not yet.
I walk along this tension and am caught in a net of your comfort whenever I slip.
I am not only anchored there- but propelled forward into the kingdom.
I eat bread and wine.
I remember the water of baptism.
I know how this ordinary girl has turned into your servant by your extraordinary grace and everlasting love.
This ordinary day is extraordinary- the veil is diminished and we have a glimpse of your kingdom.
We are there but not yet.
But you are always with us.
Psalm written by Rev. Beth Anderson
February 26, 2012